It is hot and very humid here in Winnipeg, especially the humidity makes it more difficult to breathe. I can see another day of being tucked away in the house with the AC blasting. Thank goodness for air conditioning.
A couple of days ago I received a comment from Ed. I thank you Ed. Ed offered some constructive suggestions for the blog. When I first read his comment, I thought, well I thought that is what I am doing. Now understand I am grateful to Ed for taking the time to comment and leave his suggestions and I take it in a positive way. I can hardly take acception to something that is said that I absolutely agree with.
Ed suggested that I could open up and share my feelings, my beliefs and share my wisdom (not sure about the wisdom part, not sure what I can share) and to ask for your opinions. I had thought I was doing that. Ed I really do thank you as you made me realize, yes I have shared all of that but much of it may be months ago. I can’t imagine anyone wanting to read back through that many postings, I know I would not want to.
I realize of late I have sort of drifted off topic or what was the purpose of me starting this journal. Yes, it is my daily journal, but I had hoped to take it beyond just a daily journal and to help others with it.
What are my goals:
– be my daily journal, sharing my general thoughts and feelings. Allowing all but especially my family get an understand of who exactly is the inner me.
– provide support to and possibly help others in my situation. Help to understand, just because we have had the word dying attached to us by the medical profession, doesn’t mean we have to stop living today.
– show through my experiences that with the faith and support system I have in place, this process doesn’t have to be a really scary one.
– help the families by possibly giving them some idea of what their loved one is going through.
– encourage loved ones to spend as much time as possible with the loved one. Not to fear or dread that time, fear being possibly out of fear of saying the wrong thing.
– Encourage all to live every day in the very best way they can. This to avoid being filled with regrets when your time will ultimately come.
– mourn not what you are loosing, instead celebrate what you had.
Those were and still are my lofty ambitions. I do realize of late I have drifted away from most except the my journal part. I do want to get back on track.
Ed also suggested I ask for your opinions, so here it is. What is your opinion? You have my objectives or hopes listed. What can I do to come closer to achieving them. Please don’t be shy all opinions are welcome.
I look forward to hearing from you
I think those are fine ideas Bill and i know apart from being someone who has lost family and has come close to touching death, that as a therapist I spend a lot of time helping people to heal when they have lost someone dear to them.
And from that perspective I know people are frightened of death and I don’t think they should be as much as they are. so anything you can do to help dispel their fears and move towards a good death has gotta be good. By good i mean one in which you know that you have said all you want to say to the people you love and they have done the same with you.
And because this is so important as we live in a society that finds death such an untalkable [sorry i invented that word, but it works for me!] subject anything any of us can do to help others, and for that matter ourselves has to be encouraged.
Can I just say I am so pleased I have found your site Bill , this is just so big and needs all any of us can do on it. so keep up the good work as you are able. And I for one will keep on being here .
My only suggestion is to keep being Bill. When you’ve lost Bill, we’ve lost Bill and I don’t want to loose Bill! Selfish statement as it is, but a truthful statement.
Bill, the comment someone left–that very hurtful, hateful comment–reminds me of the things one boy in particular used to say to my boyfriend when he was in jr. high and high school. S has used a wheelchair to get around since the age of 8 due to paraplegia. Anyway, whenever this one kid would be alone with S in the washroom, he would say the vilest things to him, like, “you are a waste of skin. You don’t deserve to live. You are a worthless piece of ____. Why don’t you just do everyone a favour and kill yourself?” Here’s the kicker. That young man grew up, married, had a child and then killed himself.
Now S understands that all those times the kid said “you are a worthless piece of ____, he was projecting onto S feelings of worthlessness he held about himself but could not consciously face.
It’s so sad. I can’t imagine how much ugliness and pain must be inside someone who would leave a comment like that on your blog. It must be a most miserable, lonely human being.
Hey Bill, I totally agree with what pradapixie has said – that what you’re doing – offering support is so needed and to just get people talking about it is such a healing thing to do for the planet.
As a writer, my suggestion would be to write a blog every few days that starts with a stream of consciousness about how you feel about death/dying/living/joy/grief etc. So it’s slightly less journal/conversational style and more free-form. It will help you get a flow to your writing as well as generate deeper ideas.
Much love, S
I think that you have wonderful goals, wonderful posts and a meaningful blog. It’s your blog, and you can write what you like. It’s up to us to take from it what we will.
If you want to write about deeper things that’s great. If you want to wrtie about the ‘fluff’ that makes life light and airy then that’s great too.
I’ll be here to read it. Thank you.
Bill, if the ‘hope’ was to help people when you started this, let me assure you that coming here helps me.
Maybe YOU think you’ve wandered from that mission/purpose–I can only tell you that coming here continues to help me in a whole host of ways.
No matter what format you choose, what topic, what thoughts/feelings you share–I’ll just keep showing up.
It keeps me humble, it challenges me (which is always good!) and it reminds me of how graced I am to have what I get to have today. (and that’s without even reading a word)
I’m with Reg and Martha and Pixie and the rest.
Being Bill is more than enough.
Great book. I just want to say what a fantastic thing you are doing! Good luck!