Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Feed back please – chat room

October 30, 2011

I have received a suggestion that setting up a chat room right here on the blog may be of benefit to some. I am all  for anything that may help anyone in any way. I also know that there are those, that at times visit while in great pain or grief. Being able to chat “live” with someone who is loving, supportive and non-judgemental well may be a comfort. Something like that I am all for. In addition it could be a community gathering spot for the cyber friends that come to develop our little community here. I really do like this idea but am a little reluctant simply because I know very little about chat rooms, how they are run…. For me it would have to be something that can basically just run itself as I can commit some time to it each day but that amount of time would vary depending on my day.

As was mentioned to me, the blog is at times read all around the world which mean in all time zones. If set up as I would like to would it need to be monitored? The more I think about it the more I like the  idea. There is a huge potential to help others.

Please let me know what do you think?

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Wonders of CPAP

October 25, 2011

CPAP -Constant positive air pressure.

I have written a coupleof times about my sleep apnea. Well last week I got a new upgraded CPAP machine. It is wonderful to wake up and be awake. I joke about how when I wake up, it still takes my head about another hour to wake up. It is my wonkie head and I am in like a fog. I wake up and I am awake, wow is all I can say, what a difference.

I have read about and heard about people abandoning their CPAP machines because they are to hard to get used to. YOU ARE MAKING A BIG MISTAKE. Stick with it and you will get used to it and it is so worth it. Yes, it can take some doing to get used to it but I have been wearing mask for 7 or 8 years now and if I lay down for a nap it feels strange if I do not have the mask on.

What does it feel like wearing one of the masks. Well imager riding in a car traveling down the highway doing  100 kms per hour or about 65 mph. Stick your head out the window facing into the passing wind and breath. The inhale is very easy as the force of the passing air just pushes the air into your lungs. It is the exhale that can be a little more difficult Now imagine breathing like that all night lone.

Does it take getting used to, for sure. Is it worth the effort absolutely. Do not give up on it or go back  to it is you already have. You will not regret it.

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Preparing for the death of a loved one

October 23, 2011

I just read a very touching comment left by a person sitting at their mothers bedside. Sharing their last moment on this earth together. How many times have i said I believe it is harder on the families when the situation gets to that point. Forced to sit helplessly, wanting so badly to be able to do something, anything for their loved one.

It is a fact of live that we already have or most likely will face that situation at some point. How do we prepare our selves to deal with the passing of a loved one. I am not sure you can ever totally be prepared. We may even know a loved one has a terminal illness or is even just well advanced in years. We know their time on this earth is limited. Some where in the back  of our minds we accept this. Maybe we accept the idea more in the abstract or something. We know it to be a fact but somehow that thought remains almost unreal.

There is a huge difference between knowing something in your head and feeling it in your heart. I don’t know but I think for most, I think the real feeling of it in your heart only comes when we get THE PHONE CALL. The phone call that ……….. has happened and you should get to the hospital immediately . It is then the true weight of the situation hits you with that hollow empty feeling inside. We can no longer keep that bit of information or reality tucked away in the back of our minds. Suddenly it is reality and it hits you smack in the face.

My heart and prayers go out to each and every person or family in this difficult time.

I am open to ideas or suggestions, how do we help families prepare

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Appreciate the gift of life

October 18, 2011

This old body of mine doesn’t seem to bounce back the way it once did. The antibiotics are slowly doing their job so I shouldn’t complain. It has given me a little more rest/think time.

I received an email that got me thinking about gifts. Over our lives we have all received  scads of them. Some have come in  very elegant wrapping with a beautiful bow on the top. Others have come wrapped much less ornately. Others yet, maybe even not wrapped at all. Now how do we treat all gifts we just rip off the wrapping to get at what ever is contained within. It is what is contained within that is what we want, will possibly enjoy and even treasure. When it comes right down to it, how the gift is wrapped makes very little if any difference at all. The gift is not the fancy wrapping or ornate packaging that may surround the gift,  it is none of those things. The gift is what is contained within.

Now that got me thinking about life. Life is a gift from God. In my head that is a fact I have known and accepted all of my life. Sadly, for me it has only been this past few years that I have been able to take that knowledge from my head and feel it in my heart, which is where it really counts. Life well, It is one of those things we just take for granted. I am alive today and will be alive tomorrow, next week, next year……

With my heart I have been through a couple of episodes when the doctors just didn’t think I would survive. By the grace of God, here I am. I have come to realize every minute of life is a gift and should be appreciated as such. This gift of life is not like say the gift of a book, where we read it then put it on a shelf and can be comfortable knowing it will always be there. The gift of life is given to us on an ongoing basis, moment by moment, minute by minute. We have repeatedly received this gift so often and for so long we just take it for granted it is a gift that will just keep coming. We have to learn to appreciate the gift of each moment as we really never do know when this seemingly endless supply of gifted moments will suddenly stop.

Look around at your life. All that you see around you is the wrappings that the gift of your life has come in. Some fancy, some not so much. Is it the wrappings that determine the quality of a gift?

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Pneumonia

October 14, 2011

Gradually over the past week I have been feeling worse and worse. The ultimate chest cold. Difficulty breathing, heavy congestion in the lungs, sweats and chills.. Today Vi grabbed by the ear and off we went to the hospital. Me, whining all the way, “I don’t want to go the hospital and have to walk in and tell them I am here because I have a cold.”

Huh, who knew, I have pneumonia. Will likely be lying low for a few days.

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – controlling your feelings

October 13, 2011

An up date on my detached retina. Everything is going very well. If anything I believe my vision out of that eye is better than it was before, go figure. If I just look out of that eye vertical lines still appear a little wavy. Looking through both eyes and I don’t even notice it any more. At the time the 2 weeks of laying face down was a pain but getting better eye sight out of the deal made is very worth the effort.

As I am sitting here that has really made me think. I know I have written about this before but when I first learned I had to spend 45-50 minutes of each hour lying face down, I was not a happy camper. The first couple of days were long and boring with my back starting to get stiff and sore. I had thoughts like: “I don’t knowhow many days I have left and I don’t want to waste any of them just lying here like this.” But then the realization came back to me, I am the captain of my own ship of life. I have the ability within myself to make a conscious decision every morning as to whether I am going to have a good day or a bad day as is everyone else.If you are unable to change a situation or circumstance make the best of it. From that moment on none of my days were “wasted”. I used the time to recharge my emotional and spiritual batteries. which is something we all need to do at times. With that simple change in my thought process I changed boring wasted days to content, refreshing days. With the added bonus of improved vision it is a win/win for me. Now, I do know also that without that change in mindset the boredom would have played on me to the point where I would have eventually just said to heck with this and spent far more time up and about than I should have. Life is what we make it. Every situation is what we in our minds make it. We just need to think about that, realize that it is true and work it into our lives.

Your feelings and emotions, you are the only one that controls them. No one can make you mad, no one can make you happy. That is sometimes a hard concept to grasp and is one I struggle with. It seems the natural human reaction is: of course someone can make me angry, if someone does………. it is going to really tic me off and I am going to let them know about it. Try thinking of it as, someone else’s bad or inappropriate behavior reflects on them and them alone. It doesn’t have to affect me in anyway unless I allow it to. It takes work, it takes practice and I struggle with it at time, but I do know it is possible.

Can you imagine a day, imagine a week, image a life time in which we were able to never allow the negative, inappropriate actions or words of anyone else to bother us? What do you think about that?

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – A nice neighbor

October 11, 2011

I had a very pleasant couple of hours Monday morning. I went across the street and had 3 games of crib with our neighbor Paul. I have written in the past about my dear Aunt Isabel and of how when she visits we play a lot of crib. At some point through her visit we will sit down to play for “the championship of the world”. We both have a lot of fun with all of our “big talk” of how we are going to beat each other. Winning or loosing doesn’t even really matter for that “official tournament” it is the back and forth banter, I love it. Now I say the winning or loosing doesn’t matter and it doesn’t or could it be that I seem to have lost each and every one of our championships. lol. Yup, Aunt Isabel has taken the championship title home with her each and every time.

Well I have a new secret weapon for our next tournament and that would be Paul. Now let’s just put it this way. One of us won all three games, the first was a skunk, the second a near skunk and the third just a sound thrashing. OK, I admit it, I came back across the street head hanging low with my tail between my legs lol. Paul I thank you for the good games. I would like to be able to say I took it easy on you but we both know that actually wouldn’t be true, geesh, what can I say.

All I can say is Paul I look forward to our next chance to play and you had better be nice to me or I will be sending Aunt Isabel over