Dying Man’s Daily Journal – How to treat the dying


I read something in the newspaper today that really hit home with me. It is a light bulb went off and it hit me what a dying person wants/needs most. To know they are loved to be able to feel they are loved. That most certainly applies to me and as I am no one special just an average guy, I am going to assume it will apply to many others.
Back to the newspaper article. It is in the Oct. 24th issue of the Winnipeg Free Press. An article by Laura Eggertson, titled “You are so loved, dying soldier told”.
A little back ground of events occurring at the time at the time I am writing about. This week a crazed gunman was able to enter of Federal Parliment buildings getting to the hallway containing the very rooms in which our Federal Government was meeting in various room.
My thoughts are about happenings but minutes before that. On the way into Parliment the gunman passed our National War Memorial at which 2 members of the military stand honorary guard. As he passed that spot he shot and mortally wounded one of those unsuspecting guards. R.I.P Cpl. Nathan Cirillo.
With the shots being fired most ran for cover as I am sure I would have.
But not all, as I understand it at least 6 people rushed to the fallen soldier. At this point the gunman had fled but as I understand it none of these 6 could know to where he had gone, how far he had gone or if he would return. Yet, there they were.
Naturally, police ambulance everyone was called. Those gathered around the fallen soldier did their best to provide any assistance they could. To them this fallen soldier was a total stranger, unknown to any. That didn’t matter, they saw another human being in trouble and ran to help. I congratulate and thank all involved, I am very proud of you and you are heroes in my mind.
What struck me the most was what a nurse reportedly said as she knelt by his head, and I quote:
“You are loved. Your family loves you. You’re a good man,” she told him.
Winters told Cirillo to think about what he was doing — that he’d been standing guard at the National War Memorial. She told him what a good man he was for doing his duty.
She didn’t see a wedding ring, and didn’t know if he was married. So she just kept repeating:
“Your family loves you. Your parents are so proud of you. Your military family loves you. All the people here, we’re working so hard for you. Everybody loves you.”
The impromptu team kept waiting for an ambulance, desperately willing Cirillo to hang on.
“You are so loved,” Winters told Cirillo. “We’re all trying to help you.”
This all being said to try and bring an element of comfort to the fallen soldier. Sadly, he did not survive.

The article carried on ending a final quote from the nurse. “When you are dying, you need to be told how loved you are.”

Reading all of that just blew me away. So often the question comes up, what can I do to help someone that is dying? There is the best answer possible. Tell them they are loved, tell them they are appreciated by you and important to you. Take it one step further, try to make them feel loved and appreciated.

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5 Responses to Dying Man’s Daily Journal – How to treat the dying

  1. M T McGuire says:

    Wow yea. I’m not surprised it blew your mind.mit blew mine. Thanks for sharing that.

    Cheers

    MTM

    Thank you, B.C.
    Bill

  2. rangewriter says:

    You are so right to call attention to this, Bill. And most of all, I am blown away by how calm and coherent the woman was in the maelstrom of hell she’d just escaped. That she was so articulate and careful about how she phrased WHO loved him shows her to be a wise and extremely kind-hearted individual.

    Thank you Linda, a totally agree. There are 2 stories here one so tragic. The other illustrates the loving kindness contained in the human heart.
    Bill

  3. Mel says:

    Dying or not, I think making sure others know they’re loved and that they matter is vastly important. Those two messages changed my whole life.
    And I stand with the rest that are blown away by all the loving souls who dared to be present for the fallen soldier….and the wisdom of the nurse who spoke to him.
    What sad circumstances. How glad I am that the angels were there with him to remind him of what’s true.

    Hey Mel. You are right he was surrounded by Earh Angels plus I am sure a multitude of Heavenly Angels.
    You are so right on about the importance of making sure all know they are loved and appreciated. That is something I have always known yet this story really brought it from the back of my mind to being right in my face. I am appreciative.

  4. Hilary says:

    Dear Bill – such a brilliant post and so helpful to us .. as we read and take in her words and what she’s doing … makes so much sense – thank you for putting this up … all the best – Hilary

    Hi Hilary, she did an amazing job and taught us all many lessons while doing it
    Bill

  5. NSC says:

    Bill, I can’t remember if it was you who said this, but I remember reading that no matter what, each person needs someone to love, something to do , and something to look forward to. I try to incorporate this when I deal with others, especially the elders and those dealing with illness. I enjoyed your post.
    Thanks. NSC

    Hi. You are talking to memory guy. Not sure if I said that or not but it is most certainly something I agree with. We need those things in our lives. We need to feel a purpose for being. Without that we begin to slowly die from within.
    Bill

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