Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Getting back to normal


I had not realized how much the trip to Dauphin had really tired me out. I remember reading somewhere that 1 hour of stress is as exhausting as 8 hours of physical work. I have been just whipped. Thankfully I have the option of napping through the day and have been taking advantage of that big time.

Once I got to the hospital in Dauphin, the stress was gone. They had me drugged up totally relaxed. As I went to the Memorial Service straight from the hospital even there wasn’t nearly as stressful/emotional as it otherwise would have been without the drugs I obviously still had in my system.

Obviously, it was the stress I put myself through the preceding week that literally almost did me in. The shock of his passing, the anger/frustration knowing a medical fix had been scheduled and was less than 2 months away. OK, that last part of the drive into Dauphin, having the chest pain while knowing so far from help was stressful. I really did myself in with what I imagine would be called survivor guilt. It should have been me. I think everyone, myself included, expected it would be me. Yet here I am and only the Good Lord knows why.

i realize for that period of time I allow my view of my life and of the whole world to turn dark.
I have managed to get a lot of rest, multiple naps and I am feeling better, getting back to myself.
I have a good life and I know that. I am a lucky man in so very many different ways. I have so much to be appreciative of and I am. I am going to show that appreciation by really living life, every moment of it

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7 Responses to Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Getting back to normal

  1. Mon Ange says:

    Pray you get well soon.

    Thank you

  2. methenandnow says:

    I’m really glad you’re still here. I’m sorry you’re so tired. You still have work to do. Snap out of it.

    your comment made me chuckle, snap out of it I will

  3. dev says:

    Life has a way of trying to drag us down but our Faith in God can help us overcome our life struggles. I will keep you and your family in my daily prayers

    Thank you Dev. Our faith will get us through even the most difficult times, I can attest to that. Nice to see you here, thank you for stopping by.
    Bill

  4. Irene says:

    Dear Wiseman,
    I just happened to be paging through our local Gazette and noticed your brother’s obituary. I didn’t realize you had family out this way (Belmont/ Glenboro). Most sincere sympathy to you and the entire family. Rest up well now…be at peace…all is as it should be…
    Thinking of you often and praying for you always, Wiseman.
    Irene

    Thank you Irene. My brother’s wife, Debbie is from that area, much of her family is still in that area.

  5. Nancy Cavanaugh (NSC) says:

    Glad to hear from you; I was worried.
    NSC

    Sorry to worry you. I just needed a few days rest.

  6. hilarymb says:

    Hi Bill – well I’m glad you are back to your normal – the shock of your brother going is not surprising .. I’m just sorry I missed the rest of the story – but you are recovering thankfully … all the best to all of you – Hilary

    Hi Hilary, it was a shock. After months of delays the had finally set the date for the surgery that Doctors were confident fix him right up. Sadly he passed just days after learning of his surgery date

  7. Mel says:

    I’m relieved you took some time, sir. The physical strain of making that trip would have been enough…the emotional stress added to it…omg…I’m ever so grateful The Big Guy took such good care of you. I can’t imagine…. We’re really lucky.
    It’s good you’ve sat back a bit and just let yourself recuperate a bit. It’ll take some time to heal. Makes me sad to be so close to having a surgery so close. But that wasn’t in the plans, apparently. National healthcare has some very good aspects to it. Being told you have to wait on a lifesaving surgery….dunno…but I would suspect I’m not the only one giving thought to that.
    All things happened as they were suppose to.
    I’m greedy….I’m glad there’s still more for you to do.
    (((( Bill )))))

    Hey Mel, I am right with you on the being greedy for more time. I realize no matter how much I have, it in the end won’t be enough. I have to as we all should focus on the quality of the time left as we all should.
    I find it hard to be critical of a medical system that has kept me alive for all these years but you are right the wait times can be devastating
    Hope you are feeling better

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