Dying Man’s Daily Journal – talking to/understanding the dying


Had an appointment yesterday that, I found very helpful and thought provoking. I have been attending the Wellness Center to improve my overall fitness level. Recognizing I have a few serious issues going on I was offered the opportunity to speak with a psychologist. I have long since accepted I need medical help just to stay alive and I am willing to take that help from any medical source.
I have always worked with the thought I have to be as honest and up front with the doctors as possible. They are working to keep me alive. The more accurate the picture they have of me, the more accurate is likely to be the treatment plan. How can they possibly be expected to treat you if they only have a part of the picture as to what is going on.
OK, being with the psychologist, his questions pertained to feelings, emotions…… Now answering these types of questions is much more difficult. What percentage of the time do you feel…… In all of this there is no right or wrong answers, just how situations/feelings apply to me/you.
It was very good prodding questions that really got me thinking and brought about a greater understanding for me.
Over the years I have encountered numerous health issues mot particularly relating to the heart. Now I am thinking here of my 5 heart attacks. Now each heart attack damages heart permanently damages heart muscle. Yes, there are the various medical procedures that can restore your functioning to the point you feel great, modern medicine is a life saver for which I am so very grateful.
I am getting way off track here. This would apply to any terminal or debilitating illness.
As your health declines we learn to adapt to what has become our new norm. A few cycles of this adapting to our new norm and it gets to the point where we don’t even know what “real or health norm” feels like. Based on my decreased normal. My good day may by the standards of others be a terrible day. How are we able to communicate thar

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2 Responses to Dying Man’s Daily Journal – talking to/understanding the dying

  1. hilarymb says:

    Hi Bill – I’d have thought the psychologist should know … but so often ‘carers’ / ‘experts’ actually can never read the position from this side of the fence – which always seems challenging to me.

    Irritates me too – at how uneducated people are now … or lacking in thought – they can’t seem to think …

    I take strawberries up to a lady who is bed ridden and has been for years … so she can enjoy some food – it’s not brilliant (the food – not my strawberries!!) … and she enjoys having them at supper time – but no they were brought in for lunch … no asking – would she like them now or later. I don’t know … something else I need to clarify when I go up – but you’d think they’d know to ask by now …

    One of the greatest lessons I’ve had in recent years is watching my relatives decline – I’ve been lucky .. they’ve all gone along their journey adapting as best possible.

    Interesting – I hope you’ll tell us more of this journey … cheers Hilary

  2. Cat says:

    As your health declines we learn to adapt to what has become our new norm. A few cycles of this adapting to our new norm and it gets to the point where we don’t even know what “real or health norm” feels like.

    Oh, I can totally relate to this, not from the standpoint of a terminal illness but a chronic one. I’ve been living with rheumatoid arthritis for over a decade and I’m always trying to figure out a way to explain to people who ask me how I’m feeling that when I’m feeling well, I’m not feeling as well as they are when they’re feeling well, because my baseline for feeling well has changed.

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