Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Alone at Christmas


I was thinking this morning (yes to family and friends, I can still do that just not often. LOL I think). I caught a weather forecast a day or two ago and saw there were massive storms forecast or happening all over the place. Holiday travelers are stranded, flights cancelled all sorts of things going on that would prevent many from making it to their Christmas destinations. Now that has to suck. Possibly being stranded in an airport or alone in a strange city, not at all where you want to be, especially at this time of the year.

As I thought of it I realized there are also many many others alone this Christmas Season. Now there can be countless reasons for this many beyond our control. It could be lack of money that prevents us from travelling, it could be having to work, there are all sorts of reasons. Or, it could be we are feeling terribly alone due to the passing of a loved one and this may in fact be our first Christmas without them. This list of reasons could just go on and on. irregardless of the reason why many of us are alone this Christmas. Many may be experiencing great dispare, anger, regret…… another list that could just go on and on.

It is to those that I specifically address this message, I pray it finds you.

As things in life work out, as I sit here I am alone. No family visits even Vi is not here. Where is Vi? Some time back she took on a part time job. Working ever second weekend. It is something she loves doing so good for her. Every second weekend, huh, that just happens to work out to be this weekend. Hey she is even working a double shift,now what is up with that. Actually, I have to tip my hat to her for doing it. She could have had the time off but instead opted for the double shift. To give some of the other workers with small children a chance to have the day off to spend with their families.

Now, here I have a choise to make. I can get myself all in a fret, stew about it and spoil my own Christmas Day. I mean come on now, none of the kids will be here and then Vi goes and takes on a double shift at work, geesh. Don’t they realize that means I am going to have to spend Christmas Day and most of the evening alone!!!!! don’t they realize the entire universe is supposed to revolve around me, especially at this time of the year. NOW WHAT IS UP WITH THAT.

Or, I can accept just “maybe” the entire universe doesn’t revolve around me, my plans and what I want. Now that is a humbling thought. Sometimes things just happen in spite of what I would like or want.

I am happy,content with the knowledge the kids are all safe and in a place where they are celebrating a wonderful Christmas. I am proud of Vi for taking on that extra shift so someone with a family on hand can be at home with them. I guess that means I accept the Universe does not revolve around me, how can that be. lol

If you happen to be alone some where and are feeling down or lonely and this message happens to find you. Please leave me a comment. I am not going to just sit here all day on the blog. But I will check in fairly often and if I do see such a message I will reply immediately. If the timing is right maybe we can get some sort of dialogue going between us. We can celebrate, alone but together.

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8 Responses to Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Alone at Christmas

  1. Mel says:

    Awwwwww……she’s such a sweetheart, that one.

    I’m ‘the boss’–and I was into work yesterday and again early this morning. It gave people with small kiddos the availability to spend the morning/evening with them. And I got to be with the kiddos at work–some who don’t have families to go to.

    Not to mention we got 12″ of snow yesterday, so traveling for some folks just wasn’t a safe option.

    This afternoon–snowangels!!!!
    And himself will be eventually have a dinner put together.
    And we’ll watch Polar Express.
    But for now–I’m just hangin’ and enjoying the nothingness that happens with freshly fallen snow and an empty house. 🙂

    Happy Christmas to you, sir!
    No time for sitting in unhappiness! I’ve got snowangels to make! 🙂

    Mel, you got it. Make snow angels and have a blast doing it.

  2. eirikr1965 says:

    I’m often alone with my Son as i attend to his many complex needs. Today also. But while I may be alone, I am never lonely because I feel the connection to those that care, or are thinking of me, as I am thinking of them. I absolutely feel it and thus never truly feel alone.
    Those connections can be far reaching and they make the world go round.

    And so I say ‘cheers’ for this connection we share.

    hi Eric, excellent message. We really are never alone. Cheers
    Bill

  3. Kath says:

    Dear Bill, here in Australia we have celebrated our Christmas ahead of you. I had a great day with my other half but the kids are in different states so weren’t with us, there were many phone calls from them though. We had a wonderful day!

    But you are right, it’s a bit of a shock when you find yourself alone, at first I didn’t like it- but now i cherish it because it gives me time to think and check that I am still on track mentally and ok about dying, time alone helps me to revive my soul.

    Have a wonderful day Bill, and may there be many more, Kath

    Hi Kath, I also use my time alone to get myself or keep myself mentally on track. I am having a very good day.
    Nice to hear from you
    Bill

  4. On Christmas Eve Day, I spent time with a few of my family (nephew’s home). I took a ferry from my small island to their bigger one and the ride was wonderfully rocky and rolly. I love a good ride on the water.

    I came home last night in the pouring rain, full of love and gratitude. I LOVE Christmas Eve. It’s my all time favorite night of the whole year. It’s my portal of peace. It is truly my time with the Divine.

    This morning, after bringing in armloads of wood, I started a roaring fire, put on a big pot of porridge and opened my prezzies. This afternoon, I will go to friends for dinner and a walloping game of cribbage with a 90 year-old.

    I love having some time with family and friends over the Christmas season, but after years of looking after church activities and then a number of seniors, it’s a joy to have alone time.

    Love to you in bushels, Bill.

    The ferry ride sounds like fun. Hey, I wish you luck at the cribbage. When my Aunt comes to visit, I usually get the wallaping. You enjoy that time you deserve it.
    Bill

  5. Betty says:

    Hi Bill,

    Our big family night is Christmas Eve. We had a wonderful meal and a wonderful time. Today after a morning of presents and breakfast with our daughter, son-in-law and granddaugter we were quite content to return to our quiet home to relax and reflect as well as take a little nap. Wishing you a Merry Christmas and only good things in the New Year.

    Betty

  6. Cocorue says:

    dear Bill,
    we just wanted to wish you a very Merry Christmas and only the best for 2011.

    you take care, you hear and we will be back to check up on you

    chikisses
    coco, tiffy and mumster lilian

  7. Patty says:

    Hello Bill,
    I found your blog through Daria’s. I wish I’d seen this post yesterday and would’ve shared my day with you. I as admitted to the hospital on Friday afternoon for severe dehydration from nausea and vomiting for 3 days. My sister didn’t bring me my laptop until last night.

    I wasn’t “all” alone yesterday; my family and friends did spend some time with me, but I wasn’t at HOME and I did feel alone, especially with my kids gone- one in Chicago, and one in northern Arizona in a big snowstorm.

    This is the first time I’ve seen your blog so I’m going to take a stroll and try to get to know about you some. No matter what kind of cancer we have, it IS a lonely thing and I believe we were all put on this earth to watch over each other and help each other out. Feel free to check out my blog- if it’s not to your liking, that’s okay. But I wanted to say Merry Christmas to you and wish you the best of all things.

    🙂
    patty

  8. Jill says:

    I’d say aw poor Bill but I know you don’t view it that way and neither do I. My husband is a pet sitter and our busiest times are weekends and holidays. I work full-time during the week. So for the past four days he’s had 8 jobs and has left at 8am and not gotten home until 7:30pm. Christmas Day for me was doing laundry, reading a whole book, catching up on blogs, letting out dogs in and out and in and out and…you get the picture. All in all a nice day even though I was by myself. I have to admit I had a few seconds of feeling sorry for myself but only a few seconds. I feel so lucky to even have a family! Hope the rest of your Christmas was merry and wishing you blessings in the new year.

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