Through one of my adventures in the hospital, I am firmly convinced God has a sense of humor. I laugh at it now but at the time, geesh.
One of the procedures performed on me was a type of double angiogram, I suppose you would call it. An incision is made in your lower belly area, just above the groin. A long tube is then inserted into the artery and follow the artery up to and into your heart. This time it was a little different than in the past. This time 2 tubes were inserted one into an artery and the second into a vein. Both are pushed up to the heart. This way they can check the pressures of the blood flow both in and out of the heart. Now that is as I understand it. Now from the patients point of view that sounds scary having a tube in your heart. From the patients point of view though it is a very simple, easy procedure. You are wide awake and just lay there. There is no pain, no discomfort nothing at all like that. Now as the incision is made into a major artery and/or vein direct pressure is applied to it immediately afterwards to stop bleeding. The only hard part for the patient is you then have to lay absolutely still for 3 hours to let the cut heal and not break open again.Now if the hardest part of the procedure is laying still for 3 hours, I certainly have nothing to complain about.
It was suggested I don’t wear underwear of pants that first day as the waist band may rub on the incision area and may cause it to break open, fair enough.
So there I am, clad in one of those hospital gown, the ones that tie in the back. It reached to about my knee so my “frontal” area was well covered. The behind area is much less covered. I put on one of the hospital dressing gowns to protect my modesty and cover the back half of me, everything is good. It has reached the point where I am past that 3 hour period of laying still, I have been up and moving around for a couple of hours. I am trying to be careful and am walking a little slow but it is all going fine.
Vi is visiting and the time comes when she is leaving. The nurses maybe somewhat reluctantly give me permission to walk her down to the front door. Everything is just fine. We get to the front door and it is a beautiful sunny day outside and I have been cooped up inside for 3 days straight at this time. I decide to walk her to the car and get just a little fresh air. The trip to the car and back will only take 3 or 4 minutes, off we go.
Now remember how I am dressed. It would be roughly comparable to a knee length dress, with NOTHING on underneath. Off we go, it is wonderful to be outside, that is until an unexpected gust of wind comes along and raises my “skirt”. I am in a panic trying to get it down. I get it down and am hanging on for dear life. I am embarrassed and look around but thankfully no one seems to have noticed. Doing this though I do notice there are a number of ladies coming and going all wearing skirts or dresses and the wind isn’t affecting them at all, huh.
I am feeling a little conspicuous hanging on as I am. I think well it must have been just some little freak gust or something and I let go. Bang, up it goes again. This time I am hanging on and not letting go. We get to the car and I do let go just to give her a hug and you guessed it, at least this time it was just the back end. Needless to say I hung on for dear life for the rest of my outing and never went outside dressed like that again.
Now you tell me God doesn’t have a sense of humor. Ladies skirts not even moving in the breeze, mine up around my ears. Sorry to anyone that may have seem a little more than they have been expecting