Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Have a good vacation Vi

March 12, 2010

As I write this Vi is literally thousands of feet up in the air. Yup, she is on a plane heading for L.A..

She is off for what I hope, well I know will be a wonderful vacation. She is meeting son David, his wife Kelly and their 2 sons Dawson and Carter, who have driven down to L.A. from their home in Victoria. Dave, Kelly and the boys really are such a nice wonderful family. It will be so nice for Vi, they are doing the whole tourist thing while in California, Disney Land and about everything else.

I have been teasing Vi. She will be landing at LAX. Who know she may see Harrison Ford or George Clonney, who may sweep her off her feet and I may never see her again. Hmm is this trip really a good idea. LOL. I hope they have a wonderful time.

Man, this getting up at 4:00am to get her off to the airport is tiring. Off for an early nap.


Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Open your heart

March 11, 2010

I am such a lucky man and so very happy to be a part of this world. It is just so full of kind,loving and inspirational people. We just have to find a way to really open our eyes to see them, recognize what they are doing and appreciate and be inspired by them. How do we open our eyes to see the reality of what is truly around us? This world of ours is just overflowing with kind, loving generous people. OK, this is something I have “sort” of known all of my life but it is only in the past few years that this has really become so very clear to me.

Oh, for sure there are some “jerks” in this world, some people that are just not so nice. If we take into account the entire population of this world, the number of “jerks” would make up a very small per centage. Why don’t we see this, realize it and appreciate it? Does one rotten apple have to spoil the entire barrel? Do we really have to see the world that way?

Time for a “Bill statistic”, one that I know I have used before. First off to be clear, what is a “Bill statistic”? It is very scientifically obtained. I take something, rattle it around in my head for 10 or 15 seconds and what ever sounds reasonable to me becomes a “Bill statistic”. Hey it is my blog and I can make up my own statistics. lol

About 90% of people are regular hard working, kind, nice people just doing their best to get through their day while raising their families. About 5% are what I call Earth Angels, those that step up and go the extra mile to help another. That leaves the remaining 5%, the jerks, enough said about that group. The tricky part is we all float back and forth between those “groups” depending on the circumstances and situation. Yes, I can be a jerk at times, but so can you,so there.

Based on these very scientifically obtained statistics we are surrounded by kind, loving and generous people, yet we don’t see it or realize it and appreciate it. I suppose possibly the news media is at least partially to blame for this. Most of what we hear or read day after day is the bad stuff, the negative actions of the small minority of the population. When that is all we hear or read,maybe it is no wonder our out look on the world has become at least somewhat jaded. What do we need to do to open our eyes to see the true world around us?

We all have such busy hectic lives that it is so easy to just with draw into our own little world seemingly content with that. Could there be more to life if we open our eyes and hearts to the wonders around us? Not look at everything and everyone with negative suspicion. What do you think?

I have never imagined myself to be a writer,more of just a rambler. That is why I will often copy and quote the wonderful messages I often get via email. Here is another I received. THis time I even know the author to give ful credit to:

When we choose not to focus on what is missing from our lives but are grateful for the abundance that’s present…we experience heaven on earth.
  ~ Sara Ban Breathnach

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – taking it in stride

March 10, 2010

Wow, the past few days here on the blog have been kind of wild, not sure if that is the right word to describe it, Now a day or two ago I did receive a comment that did catch me by surprise. Let’s just say it was not all that flattering to myself and hey, I never expect everyone to agree with everything I have to say and that is fair enough. Normally I would just blow this comment off, giving it the attention I think it deserves, which is none.

Now again I quote my dear departed MUM. She used to joke that when as a child I was vaccinated it must have been with a gramophone needle as I always have to get my say into everything. So here I go again.

I have realized life lessons can come from the most unusual or unexpected places. What have I learned from this experience. I have a lot of loving friends that have contacted me either here on the blog or via email. I do thank all for their support and encouragement.

Possibly it comes from being a banker all of my life. Now being a banker isn’t always the quiet and boring life you might think. Over the years as circumstances dictated I was required to refuse to cash cheques, refuse loans, repossess vehicles…… Now none of those things made me the most popular guy at that moment. Over the years I have been cursed at, threatened and once even punched in the mouth. With all of this I somehow learned not to take it personally. I suppose I had developed my own version of the garbage truck theory. (I wrote about it a couple of posts back). Lets take the case from back in my banking days and suppose I had to decline a loan. Early in my career I stressed over this, feeling so very bad that I had to decline them. With time  I came to realize, it was not my fault their credit rating sucked or what ever was the reason. I came to realize, yes they were upset but it was at the situation, being declined for the loan. I was just the guy sitting across the desk from them, the only one there that they could take their anger, frustration and disappointment out on. I suppose I developed a thicker skin and a better understanding of not taking things personally. There are always 2 ways you can look at everything.

Over the course of the blog I am very proud that almost 6,000 comments have been left. All but a handful have been very kind, loving and supportive. I can not begin say how proud I am of all of my blogging friends,of how lucky I consider myself to have you all in my life. It is what is contained within so many of the comments that is most important to me.Yes, many contain kind and loving support for me, which I do appreciate so very much. But it goes so very far beyond that. Many others have in a time of need written in often sharing their own pain and grief. My dear blogging friends are always there in that time of need, providing loving support for any and all that come. It has gotten to the point I like to think of the blog more as a community of loving supportive friends. A community I am so very proud to be but a part of.

Now with that many comments there are bound to be a few, that let”s just say are outside the norm. I remember one way back somewhere that even said something to the effect: “Why don’t you just die already and quit wasting space on the internet”. Can’t remember how or even if I responded. I have grown with time and back then I imagine I had something to say.

To the dear blogging friends that have rushed in to support me with this, I thank you so very much. Please know I am fine with any comments directed at me. I will read such comments.Look to see if I feel it has any merit, see if I can learn from it and then pay it no mind.

The final lesson I have learned, is I have some work to do on myself. Any comment directed to me or at me, I can easily shrug off. BUT, disparaging comments directed at my mum or any of my family and my hackles go up.

Now this is my blog and I make the rules. I have always invited all comment,hey even those I might not personally agree with. That still applies comments from all are always welcome. BUT, any comments that I in my own judgement read as being mean spirited will be deleted entirely.

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – A New Beginning

March 8, 2010

There is something strange happening in this house. There is an old guy living in our mirror, every time I look in the mirror I see him there. Now how did that happen? Every time I look in the mirror, there he is, geesh. This guy in the mirror obviously looks much older and has less hair than I do?????

It is strange in that I do face that mirror at least 10 or 12 times a day between shaving, brushing teeth, washing……. but i guess I never really look at the reflection. i suppose I am concentrating more on the task at hand. This morning I was brushing my teeth and I am not sure what prompted me to do it but I really looked at that guy staring back at me. I am sure glad I have been getting all those emails about how it is good to grow and look old. lol. Actually, none of this bothers me in the slightest.

THis all brought to mind something my dear mother used to tell me,  way way back when.

Everyday at some time you are going to have to face yourself in the mirror. When you do look beyond the physical person you see looking back at you. Look at yourself as a person who you are. Get past the physical appearance and ask yourself, am I happy, content even a little proud to be the person I see staring back at me in the mirror. As you stare at your reflection ask yourself, am I the person I want to be, living the life I want to live. If in fact the answer to any of those questions if no, then ask yourself, OK, what am I going to do about it? She was a great believer in every or any single moment in time was the perfect time for a new beginning or to start a change. Putting it off was just wasting time.

Dwelling in or fretting about the past will ruin your today and possibly spoil your tomorrow. Anew beginning is exactly that, beginning anew, the past is gone let it go, concentrate on today. Now  by her definition though the past was gone and should be left alone. EXCEPT for yesterday, that one day only.

As you look into that mirror think of yesterday. Am I satisfied with my behaviour etc. on that day. If not what am I going to do to make ammends, or learn from it. What am I going to do to ensure, what ever it may have been doesn’t happen again.

Some how that message has struck with me over the years. I can look back  to my younger and maybe a little bit wilder days. There were days when I dreaded the thought of facing myself in that mirror. Maybe there weren’t enough of these times, but I do remember a few times when the thought of facing  that damn mirror in the morning actually did cause me to stop and think before leaping into action.

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Inspiration

March 6, 2010

I believe every thing that happens in this life, happens for a reason. Now to understand the reason why things do happen is beyond me, they just do. Based on our personal  will,sometimes these things are to our liking sometimes they are not but they do happen.

Now, I have written of how of late I have been feeling just plain to lazy to do much, lots of reasons why, but I am not even going to get into them. I needed a push or an inspiration to get me up and moving and even back to blogging. I also believe the good Lord will send someone into our lives, when we need them and they will give us that push or inspiration. Now that is exactly what has happened to me over the past few days.

Now, why did I even start this blog? Creating a bit of a legacy I suppose, sharing my inner most thoughts and feeling with and for my children, grandchildren….. But also by sharing this last leg of my earthly journey,  I hoped to give a better understanding and a place of support for both those in my condition and the families. Over time it seemed to evolve to the point where I am trying in my own rambling way to encourage, urge all to really live life. Appreciate life,  live it so that when you reach this point you are not filled with regrets of time wasted, of things left undone or unsaid.

Now as I write this, it had been my plan to go back in the archives and look some of the posts in which I have encouraged really living life, not wasting any time on negativity. I looked and realized this is post #785, geesh do I ever like to ramble. Now did I mention feeling lazy? Well to lazy to go through all of those, but I know such posts are there.

I have talked about a moment wasted in negativity is a moment of joy lost forever. I am sure I would have given examples of how external forces, other people or situations can if we allow it spoil our day, IF WE ALLOW IT. Now, I am memory guy, so I am not sure of anything. But I am pretty sure I would have written using my favorite example. A rude or discourteous store clerk or disgruntled fellow employee. They are having a bad day, are in a foul mood and take it out on everyone else, you in this case. Don’t take it personally, they are having a bad day but we don’t have to allow there mood to spoil our own. Instead feel sorry for them, even pray for them. For them to be in such a mood, obviously they are having issues in their own lives. But don’t take it personally.

OK, back to how I got my little nudge or inspiration to get on with life. My wonderful cousin Gloria sent me an email. It contained one of those inspirational message that are out there floating around. The origins of most is totally unknown. Did I mention how I have been feeling lazy, to lazy to get here on the blog. Well this particular email really struck me. I had been feeling kind of guilty about not posting on the blog so I decided to copy and post it, and I did under the title Garbage. Check it out, posted on March 2/10.

What followed was a comment left by Dawn Lynn:

Dawn Lynn Says:
March 3, 2010 at 8:22 am | Reply   edit

Thanks for posting this great story! My name is Dawn, and I work with David J. Pollay, the author of The Law of the Garbage Truck™. I just wanted to stop by and let you know that you can read the original story on David’s blog, http://davidjpollay.typepad.com/david_j_pollay/lawofthegarbagetruck.html. It would mean a lot to us if you would let people know that David is the author of The Law of the Garbage Truck.

You can also find out more information about The Law of the Garbage Truck on http://www.thelawofthegarbagetruck.com. Make sure to check out the video of people in New York City taking the No Garbage Trucks!™ Pledge: http://www.bewareofgarbagetrucks.com. It’s pretty cool.

It is so wonderful how you are sharing your life and all it has to offer to others. Sometimes we stop living to the fullest. You are a postive role model to others.


Dawn, I thank you for the comment. First off it allowed me to give proper credit to the author. Far more important for me was the comment lead me to the wonderful sites she listed. Everyone Please check them out. I read the Garbage Truck story and I even took the pledge available on the site. It has me all fired up.

Here in a professionally written form is essentially the very message I have im my own rambling way been trying to get across. David J. Pollay is obviously a professional gifted writer. He has expressed professionally a part of what I have been trying to say in my rambling bumbling manner. Please check it out.

I have since learned he has a book coming out The Law of the Garbage Truck will be hitting book stores this summer being published by Sterling, a Barnes and Noble. It is a definite must read for me

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Getting Lazy

March 5, 2010

A realization has come to me over the past little while. I have allowed myself to become lazy and there is no denying it. In my head I can justify and rationalize it but that doesn’t change it.

I haven’t been feeling to spry this past while. Not even any specific symptoms, tired sort of worn out, really no energy for anything juist not feeling all that well. Now  feeling that way makes it is so easy to take the easy path and just lay around doing nothing. Well now the Olympics were on and that just added to the desire to just lay there and watch. I really did enjoy it all and am a very proud Canadian.

I realize though that one of my constant themes throughout this entire blog has been living life, enjoying life. Now that does in fact take at least some effort. I am struggling to find the correct wording here that really describes what I am trying to say.

Life is a wonderful adventure but it is one of those things that, the more you put into it the more you get back. It seems so easy to get caught in the “doing nothing” rut. By that I mean we plod almost blindly through our days, doing really other than what we have to, to in fact just get through the day. By my definition that falls into the catagory of enduring life and not really living it. I suppose when I use the term enduring life that word endurning can conjure up all sorts of thoughts of an aweful life, having to be endured. Now legitimately for some this may be the case. For so many others though, myself included, we “endure” or “put up” with our lives day after day simply because we don’t take the time or put forth the effort to get something out of or to enjoy life.

Now, I can only imagine the responce to that by so many would be, but, I have no time, I don’t have enough money or I just don’t have enough energy (me). That list could be almost endless. To that I say this:

“I have no time”. If something is important to you, you can always take or make the time for it. Now what could be more important to you than living an enjoyable good life We each only have a limited number of days in our lives, how many do we want to waste simply plodding away?

“I don’t have enough money’ Living Life is a mind set, no money is required. Look around you, life is wonderful, life is beautiful. just take the time to enjoy what you have.

“I just don’t have enough energy” Geesh, can I relate to this one. OK, I know  my  days on this earth are numbered and I know that number is a lot lower than I would like. Now this is something I can’t change. Now  when you are dealing with a terminal illness, it isn’t like having the flu where you know rest up for a day or two and I will feel better. What I have today is what I will have tomorrow. How many times have I written about in every situation you have two choices, positive or negative. I could curl up in a ball and really stop living life before my physical body does. OR, I can get my butt in gear and put forth what energy I can and start living.

Now, some may pass that right back saying something like, yeah but that doesn’t fit into my situation. I will try to give another example of what I am trying to say. Let’s just suppose you have to go for dinner with your in-laws, or a company Christmas party.It could be anything, just an event you just really, really don’t want to go to but due to what ever circumstances you just have to. Back to the two choices. Negative, I don’t want to go, I know I will be miserable and hate every minute of it. Almost guaranteed it will live down to your expectations, you “know” you will have a miserable time AND you will. Other choice, “well I really don’t want to go, but I guess I have to, so I might as well make the best of it and have a good time AND you will

What are your thoughts on this

Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Garbage

March 2, 2010

Hopeto have up a regular post tomorrow. for today got another of the amazing messages my cousin Gloria sends me:

Law of the Garbage Truck

One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport.
We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us.
My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us.
My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. And I mean, he was really friendly.
So I asked, ‘Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!’
This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, ‘The Law of the Garbage Truck.’

He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment.
As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they’ll dump it on you. Don’t take it personally.

Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don’t take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets.

The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day.
Life’s too short to wake up in the morning with regrets,
so … Love the people who treat you right.
Pray for the ones who don’t.
Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it!
 Have a blessed, garbage-free day!

PS. A special big thank you to Dawn Lynn. She has kindly left us a comment about this very post. With most of the many emails floating around that contain wonderful sayings or words or wisdom, we usually dont kinow the origins and are unhable to give due credit to the author. I have learned that David J. Pollay is indeed the author and I applaud him for this wonderful work. Please read the comment left by Dawn it contains links to various sites containing so much more on this. I checked them out quickly this morning and will be returning to learn more.

Thank you Dawn and I hope to hear more from you.