Dying Man’s Daily Journal – taking it in stride


Wow, the past few days here on the blog have been kind of wild, not sure if that is the right word to describe it, Now a day or two ago I did receive a comment that did catch me by surprise. Let’s just say it was not all that flattering to myself and hey, I never expect everyone to agree with everything I have to say and that is fair enough. Normally I would just blow this comment off, giving it the attention I think it deserves, which is none.

Now again I quote my dear departed MUM. She used to joke that when as a child I was vaccinated it must have been with a gramophone needle as I always have to get my say into everything. So here I go again.

I have realized life lessons can come from the most unusual or unexpected places. What have I learned from this experience. I have a lot of loving friends that have contacted me either here on the blog or via email. I do thank all for their support and encouragement.

Possibly it comes from being a banker all of my life. Now being a banker isn’t always the quiet and boring life you might think. Over the years as circumstances dictated I was required to refuse to cash cheques, refuse loans, repossess vehicles…… Now none of those things made me the most popular guy at that moment. Over the years I have been cursed at, threatened and once even punched in the mouth. With all of this I somehow learned not to take it personally. I suppose I had developed my own version of the garbage truck theory. (I wrote about it a couple of posts back). Lets take the case from back in my banking days and suppose I had to decline a loan. Early in my career I stressed over this, feeling so very bad that I had to decline them. With time  I came to realize, it was not my fault their credit rating sucked or what ever was the reason. I came to realize, yes they were upset but it was at the situation, being declined for the loan. I was just the guy sitting across the desk from them, the only one there that they could take their anger, frustration and disappointment out on. I suppose I developed a thicker skin and a better understanding of not taking things personally. There are always 2 ways you can look at everything.

Over the course of the blog I am very proud that almost 6,000 comments have been left. All but a handful have been very kind, loving and supportive. I can not begin say how proud I am of all of my blogging friends,of how lucky I consider myself to have you all in my life. It is what is contained within so many of the comments that is most important to me.Yes, many contain kind and loving support for me, which I do appreciate so very much. But it goes so very far beyond that. Many others have in a time of need written in often sharing their own pain and grief. My dear blogging friends are always there in that time of need, providing loving support for any and all that come. It has gotten to the point I like to think of the blog more as a community of loving supportive friends. A community I am so very proud to be but a part of.

Now with that many comments there are bound to be a few, that let”s just say are outside the norm. I remember one way back somewhere that even said something to the effect: “Why don’t you just die already and quit wasting space on the internet”. Can’t remember how or even if I responded. I have grown with time and back then I imagine I had something to say.

To the dear blogging friends that have rushed in to support me with this, I thank you so very much. Please know I am fine with any comments directed at me. I will read such comments.Look to see if I feel it has any merit, see if I can learn from it and then pay it no mind.

The final lesson I have learned, is I have some work to do on myself. Any comment directed to me or at me, I can easily shrug off. BUT, disparaging comments directed at my mum or any of my family and my hackles go up.

Now this is my blog and I make the rules. I have always invited all comment,hey even those I might not personally agree with. That still applies comments from all are always welcome. BUT, any comments that I in my own judgement read as being mean spirited will be deleted entirely.

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9 Responses to Dying Man’s Daily Journal – taking it in stride

  1. Thank you for sharing your story…you are truly a testament to how all of us should be living our lives every day…

    Welcome to the blog. I thank you so very much for your so kind comment. I do hope you will return
    Bill

  2. dave says:

    At aboy Bill ! The comments from Robinson were just plain cruel and I am glad you left it for us to read with contempt. I read your blog because like you I was diagnosed with congestive heart failure and given a 50% chance of living 2 1/2 to 3 years—that was 4 years ago this month. I am doing pretty darn good and will be 60 this year BUT not a day goes by that I forget the feeling of being told of my prognosis. I understand your lack of energy , shortness of breath etc. You are not wallowing in self pity just sharing with us your thoughts and feelings along this journey. Everyday we wonder if THIS is the day as you must have wondered with your last heart attack. Keep up the battle , rest when you must , hit delete when necessary , keep writing!

    Hi Dave and welcome to the blog. We do have a lot in common. Congratulations on hitting the 4 year mark, you hang in there and you will have many more years ahead of you. You are right it can be difficult, wondering day by day if this is “THE DAY”. That last heart attack did set me back a little and got the mind racing a little more than was comfortable.
    I am glad to hear you are doing well and I hope to hear more from you hear on the blog.
    Bill

    • Mel says:

      Oh Dave–I’m so glad for you!! How awesome to have been gifted such wondrous gifts!

      ((((((( dave )))))))

      Congratulations to you, sir. And thanks for ‘decloaking’ to share with us. 🙂

      hey Mel, let’s hopewe hear more from Dave.

  3. planetcity1 says:

    Hey, Bill:
    Here’s a project that might be of interest to you:
    http://canadianmosaic.ca/index.html

    Hi PC, thanks for the referal. I think the site is wonderful. The pictures of all the proud Canadians making up the mosaic of the flag. I am a proud Canadian and will be checking into it further. Thanks again and nice to hear from you
    Bill

  4. Tasneem R says:

    Hi Dave ! Well you’re a strong being !

    Hi Tas,nice to hear from you. Dave is obviously indeed a very strong man

  5. Irene says:

    Dear Bill,
    I haven’t dropped by to make a post in a while, but I’ve been following along just the same. Anyways, I figure Mr. Robinson must be either very sad or very scared. If you think about it, any creature that is threatened will usually come out fighting. Perhaps his perceived threat is from his own state of health. He may feel threatened by your calm attitude to your own plight. He may feel threatened by any of us that post support–perhaps he is without any networking. Basically I feel sorry for him. He’s not in a good spot inside his head. It must be tough to be so angry.
    Thinking about you often and offering up prayers for you constantly, Wiseman.
    Irene

    Hi Irene, you are missed when you are away. I believe anytime I meet another that may be say a little cranky, I offer up a prayer for them. There must be issues in their life of which I am not aware that are causing them to act that way.
    As to my calm attitude, believe me I do have my moments.I figure I am entitled to a “few” moments. i just don’t allow myself to dwell on it or I may in fact find myself curled up in a ball in a corner. Two ways to look at everything
    Nice to hear from you my friend

  6. Mel says:

    Yup–definitely your blog, sir. And this is a community.
    I don’t worry about your decision making about what needs to go. I know this is a ‘safe place’–a loving place. You’ll make decisions based on maintaining that–for everyone who nestles in the warmth they find here. I trust you. Just as the rest of the folks who come here–trust you.

    ((((((( Bill )))))))

    And IF there comes a moment where a ‘shot in the shorts’ is needed cuz you’re wallowing and it’s getting destructive, rest assured you can trust US.

    Everybody has ‘moments’.
    The trick is to surround yourself with people who care more about your LIFE, who’ll jumpstart you if it’s needed.
    I don’t think you need to worry about THAT not happenin’….LOL You’re surrounded! 😉

    (((((((((((( Bill )))))))))))))))

    Hi Mel,I am counting on you all. If I get to wallowing destructively, please give me that “shot in the shorts”

  7. Jaymie says:

    I love how you remind me to live a gracious life and carve my own path. Hugs to you and yours Bill!

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