I am feeling good, tired but good. Sad that all the grand kids have gone home and will miss them all. Small children have such energy and are constantly on the go. Even if you are not actively involved in what ever it is they are doing, it is somehow tiring just watching them use up so much energy.
Saw my doctor on Monday. He is still concerned about the diabetes and the complications it may pose, with my heart. He spoke of foreseeing a major bump on the highway of my life coming soon. Major bump, minor bump it is all a matter of perspective, back to my two ways you can look at everything. I am excited about my life and am ready for all that live brings to me.
I just backed up to restart this paragraph as what I am saying fits right in with something a dear blogging friend Jill, asked of me. To share any tips I may have on writing. Sharing tips on my writing style now that is a tough one, I don’t think I have a style. I think of this as my journal and just sit and write what ever thoughts are in my head. When I think of it, that makes it so much easier for me. No planning, no editing nothing, just write what comes to mind. When I see the obvious work so many others put into their posts I realize how easy I have it. OK, back to what I had written before.
Today, as with most days as I come to the computer, I had no idea what I would post about, that is other than the little bit on family and health. I have to admit at the very beginning of the blog I used to fret about this a little. Sort of like, gee I am writing something on the internet I should have something maybe even meaningful to say. I don’t worry at all about that anymore. I just come and type whatever. I know something will come to me, it always does.
I do though have a process or ritual what ever you wish to call it that I do every time, prior to writing anything. I come to the computer and just relax for a minute or so. Trying to get myself into a semi meditative state. I then say a simple prayer asking God to give me some thoughts that I may share that may help someone, anyone. I then ask the Arch Angels, Michael, Gabriel, Uriel and Raphael, and all the Angels in the heavens to come to my side. To guide me and assist me in understanding and sharing any message that may help someone, anyone.
I used to come at times with somewhat of an idea in my head of what it was I wanted to write. After my little ritual, I would actually start off, title the post and go to it. More often than not I would be surprised when finished, to see my thoughts had actually taken me in an entirely different direction. The title I had previously selected and typed in some how came no where close to applying to what I had written. I give every post a title but now wait to see what I have written before I name it. Some times when I am finished I think for a moment or two on what I have said and am some what surprised, thinking, huh, I never thought of it that way before.
This is why so often I refer to myself as a rambler and not a writer. I just start off and ramble on. If in fact I do on occasion come up with a thought that may strike a chord with someone, due credit should be given where it really belongs.
Today, is a perfect example of what I am saying. Beyond an idea about the first couple of thoughts, I had no idea of what I would write about. The computer is in the office/den/library what ever you want to call it. I am surrounded by many many books. I finished my first couple of paragraphs and still had no idea on what if anything I would write. I just sat back wondering, my eyes with out any thought just wandered over to one of the bookcases, lined with books. My attention was immediately grabbed by the bright gold cover on one particular book. I couldn’t just off hand think of what the book was, so had to get up and get it to check it out.
It is titled “Taking Time To Just Be”. A Helen Exley giftbook. As soon as I saw the front cover I knew immediately which book it was and knew it contains many wonderful quotes containing such wisdom.
I said a quick prayer asking for guidance and randomly opened it. I share with you a quote by Lao Tzu, from Tao Te Ching.
“We always hope someone else will have the answer. Some other place will be better, some other time it will all turn out well. This is it. No one else has the answer. No other place will be better, it has already turned out. At the center of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and what you want.”
I had to read that a few times before it hit me as to how it applies to my life. I am the one in control of my life, I am the one responsible for my life. Yes, I can look to others for guidance or suggestions on issues in my life. But I am the one that must accept responsibility for my life. I am the one that must face my own issues, deal with them and I am the one that must face the consequences of these decisions or actions. No one else should be making my decisions for me (that excluding children). I am only now really seeing, I, at the center of my being, containing the spark of God’s love, do have the answers for me.