Dying Man’s Daily Journal – Generations

Yesterday was one of my really wonkie head days. So I didn’t make it on to the computer, it is just so hard to concentrate or even just think straight, so I just relaxed.

Yesterday I would have written about the major thunder storm we had the night before. Must have been a lightening strike somewhere as our electricity was out for 5 or 6 hours. We both love watching those storms. Our front step is protected by a large overhanging eave and we will often just go out and enjoy the light show being put on by God. The sheer power contained in some of those storms can make me realize how small and powerless I actually am in the overall big picture.

I have written about how when we returned from visiting my daughter, we found our lawn had been freshly mowed. We found out it was Art our next door neighbor. Thank you Art. We really couldn’t have asked for any better neighbors than we have. Art is the same guy that comes over in the winter and uses his snow blower to clear our sidewalks for us. Such a blessing and a great help to us. Art is one of our heroes and I am going to try and get a picture to post here, let the world see what a hero looks like.

Yesterday a few of the words of a song kept rattling around in my head. It is a country song, I can’t remember the name of the song or the singer. But the lyrics speak of longing for yesterday, when a ho was a hoe, when coke was something you drink. I wonder if it is a generational thing. I look back and think life was so much simpler then. But then I wonder was it, I wonder if I could get the thoughts of my father when he was my age. Would he be looking back thinking, things used to be so much simpler and easier. I think likely he would have been. I am sure there was just as much pressure and stress back then, maybe just from a different source. There was also just as much joy, happiness and love. The world changes, we adapt and carry on, everything changes but then in some ways nothing changes.

I read somewhere, in life pain, suffering and grief are inevitable, misery is optional. The same applies today as it has at all times in the past. Misery is optional, our circumstances don’t make us happy or unhappy. It is how we deal with those circumstances that determine how we feel internally. That is so easy to say but so hard at times to do.

I am getting better at this. There was a time when if someone even a stranger on the street made some sort of rude or what I felt was an inappropriate comment, I would get all in a flap. I allowed it at times to change my mood and at times even spoil my entire day. I look back now and realize how silly that all was. Why would I allow even a stranger who happened to be in a bad mood to pass his bad mood on to me. When I think of it that way, it really doesn’t make any sense at all, but I used to allow my mood to be determined by my surroundings or happenings.

I am so grateful to be mostly past that silliness. I remember taking training courses with the bank years ago. They talked of having monkeys on your shoulders. A monkey representing a problem and of how people so often want to rid themselves of problems (monkeys) by letting them jump from their shoulders to mine. The monkey jumped and, suddenly their problem suddenly became mine. This is something I have struggled with all of my life, taking on the problems of others allowing them to become mine. Thankfully, I have reached the point where I can often think to myself. “OK, whose problem is this anyway? If it is not mine I will not take it on as mine, I will help in anyway I can but at the same time recognize who this monkey belongs to.