Dying man’s Daily Journal _ Prayers for my family Please


I am asking please for prayers for Vi and my entire family.

I am not sure if strange is the right word or maybe it is more complacent. We have all known for years my heart isn’t in the best shape and that my time was limited. Yet some how I have managed to keep plugging away day after day become month after month and then year after year. I am not sure how to word this. It is almost like, yes, we know the reality of the situation. Initially something like this is foremost on you mind, front and center. I am not sure does this make sense. I think it is a human coping mechanism, all those years back when I first heard the dying words, I think we all grappled with it, struggled with it and came to a level of acceptance. Those thoughts were at that time front and center in our minds. As time began to pass and well putting it bluntly, I didn’t die. Those thoughts in our minds were pushed a little to the side. As more time passed, thoughts began to be pushed further and further to the back of our minds. It is there that they take on an all most surreal quality.

Short post just to let all know I am fine, just tired.

Had a short break there for a phone call. Don and I have been friends since way back in the high school days. High school, in some ways that seems like it was forever ago and in others that it was not long ago at all. Where did the years go?

OK. In the call Don had me laughing out loud. He said words to the effect: “since maybe you don’t have that many posts to go, you should take this time to share your greatest wisdom.”

I had to laugh, “my greatest wisdom”. I have never professed to have any wisdom and wouldn’t know what to write. Hey, maybe tomorrow I will put up a post containing all my wisdom. I think though that it will not surprisingly be a blank page. lol

I am reading and appreciating all the wonderful comments. I will be trying to get to reply.

Again I ask for PRAYERS please

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6 Responses to Dying man’s Daily Journal _ Prayers for my family Please

  1. mark lowe says:

    Hi Bill,
    Always a pleasure to read your blogs,sort of sorts my day out after reading them,makes you look at life from a different angle ifs buts & why’s come to mind ,love strength& plenty of wisdom in return its not a bad swop of life and I hope there’s plenty more to come !!
    cheers Mark /0\

    Hi Mark, I appreciate you stopping by and leaving the message. Please remind everyone over there I am always looking for emails.
    Bill

  2. Bill, I have read your posts for many years, I’ve dropped off the blogging world as of lately but I still read your posts in my email. I hate to burst your bubble, but you are a very wise man and have taught me many things over the years. Your honesty, compassion and positive energy are a constant example of the person I would like to be. Much love to you and your family. Praying for you and looking forward to reading many more posts.
    Venus

    Hi Venus, it really is so nice to see you back, it has been a while. I hope I can look forward to hearing from you more often. I do app0reciate the kind thoughts and prayers.
    Bill

    • Laura says:

      Bill, So sorry for not replying a few posts ago, have been mostly stuck in bed and trying to get on with college. In agreement with Venus, you are a very inspiring person whose bright wisdom everyone can learn something from. I will say prayers for you in Synagogue on friday if you are ok with it. Looking foward to the next post as always, be well!

      Hey Laura. Nice to see you back. i appreciate all prayers whether they be offered up in a church, a synagogue, a mosque……. So thank you
      Bill

  3. Dave Ouellette says:

    Well Bill. I promised I would leave a comment or 2 on your blog a while back. That while back was years ago. I log in from time to time and read a couple of days or so, But because you and I talk so often on the phone and I get to see you in person as well, well I tend to make the same mistake as others by thinking since you look and sound like a “normal” person, you aren’t in any discomfort or suffering from any ailments. You know people do that to me as well. I have tried to think of something witty to leave on here for you, as you know from our many conversations that my personality dictates that I always try to do that to make people laugh to relive tension and such. It is also how I cope and deal with living with my own heart/ health issues from my day to day living as you know as well. Nothing witty my friend, sorry, just a thank you to you for everything you have done for my Family, my Mom and her Family. You made the comment that you feel you don’t have much wisdom to pass on to anyone. I can tell you that you do. I can sit and talk with you very openly about anything for hours. You and I can share our thoughts and views on many varying topics. I also can tell you that I am very happy you met my Mother and have shared a good part of your life with her and will continue to do so with the big Guys continued blessing, even if you are getting cut short to the good part of living with someone you love. K, Da, CJ and I also feel blessed for knowing you all these years. There is another lesson you have left on my boys forever thank-you, and that is getting paid .05 for picking each dandilion on your lawn is good money!!! Haha, something witty for you there after ll. Regardless Bill of how much time you have left here, just know you have touched many peoples lives in great ways and in some ways you have no idea that you did. My kids know and love you like a Grandpa and we will all see you in the Summer again hopefully as we have planned. Continue the status quo. It has worked so far and that is all any of us can do. Talk to you soon. David

    Hey Dave, I am very pleasantly surprised to see you here. Surprised yes but very happy at the same time. Your kind words have truly warmed my heart and I thank you so much for that. Must be some dust in the air or something that just hit my eye. What else could be causing me to tear up a little. I appreciate hearing of your warm thoughts and feelings and please know they are returned. I have always had tremendous respect for both you and Kelly as individuals and as parents You have a pare of wonderful boys. I enjoy our talks when we can have them, appreciate hearing your opinion on what ever we may be discussing.
    I know you are dealing with your own health issues, I admire the positive attitude you are showing through it all.
    I really am looking forward to seeing you all in the summer and know I WILL be there.
    I appreciate your witt and the teasing barbs. Are you ready here it comes: Kelly must be a fantastic mom, a wonderful parent. Look at the job she has done raising those boys inspite of the fact that you are there. OK, hit me back. lol
    I thank you so much for this comment.
    Bill
    PS fyi today it is a mind numbing -45, that is with the wind chill. Don’t you wish you were here.

  4. Mel says:

    There’s nothing like a good laugh or two, sir. I’m glad for the phone call. And I’d have to agree with David (who, by the way, spoke very loving, true things from his heart–bless him dearly!). There’s a whole lot of wisdom in there (blank page…..ha!). In the words of Christopher Robin “You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” Seems you and Pooh Bear have a lot in common. ;-)

    I’m not sure where you were headed with the post when you got the call from Don–but I know human nature and I know my experience.
    The further out I got, the less of a threat the reality was in my head. In my life, I refer to it as ‘getting cocky’. It’s not that I didn’t have the head knowledge–there was a whole lot of pressure and a huge sense of urgency waiting for the penny to drop. When it didn’t drop there was fear and awe and after a bit of time–joy and cockiness followed by complacency and a degree of denial. That sense of urgency diminished and it was ‘sorta’ another day…..even though the bottom line hadn’t changed.

    Of course I’m praying for you and Vi and the whole family. It’s another dose of what’s real getting more real and that sense of urgency comes with that package. Everyone needs a bit of peace in all that.

    ((((((((((( Bill )))))))))))))
    Rest knowing lots of prayers are being offered up. And that you’re loved hugely…..HUGELY.

    Hey Mel, I thank you for your always so kind words and prayers. You asked where I was going with the last post. Well you have said it all for me and in a much more elequent style.
    “I’m not sure where you were headed with the post when you got the call from Don–but I know human nature and I know my experience.
    The further out I got, the less of a threat the reality was in my head. In my life, I refer to it as ‘getting cocky’. It’s not that I didn’t have the head knowledge–there was a whole lot of pressure and a huge sense of urgency waiting for the penny to drop. When it didn’t drop there was fear and awe and after a bit of time–joy and cockiness followed by complacency and a degree of denial. That sense of urgency diminished and it was ‘sorta’ another day…..even though the bottom line hadn’t changed.”
    Thank you
    Bill

  5. Hilary says:

    Hi Bill … I’m pleased you’ve added this post … as it will be Vi and the family who will have a challenging time ahead – however prepared they are for it … With many many thoughts and may peace be with you all … Hilary

    Hi Hilary and thank you for the comment. I have always said I believe it is hardest on the families. I think it is time to start shifting the focus from me and more to them.
    Bill

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